The Last Letter...

There were some days when I always thought I could get what I wanted and I could achieve what I desired… One such hidden desire was to achieve your presence in my life. I knew it was very much possible but... the bigger question was HOW? I wish I could answer this bigger question on time… today when I sit and review my nostalgic past, I arrive at the conclusion that “Wrong Choices lead to right lessons in life”.
How I wished I had proposed you that day when I saw you walking from the fogbound hills… on the stoned pathways… where we first met. As I saw your blissful smile, your dew filled freshness and your unspoken love towards me!!! It all looked like a dream… WAS IT A DREAM??? Perhaps, YES. Today when I look at that feeling, the cold shadows of failure some where hurt my sense… my heart cries “YOU FOOL YOU MISSED THE CHANCE” the only consolation of course, I feel that you were not in my destiny.
Can I blame the destiny alone for it? My efforts did lack. If I had stepped forward for a proposal of a cup of coffee or a calm casual walk by the countryside, would I have at least reached closer to my destiny? I don’t know… whether to call you the lost love or the a crushed infatuation… but every time I think of you and I close my eyes… only tears roll down by cheeks… It’s a very painful feeling.
I have spoken to so many people about you and I know that I cannot achieve your presence in my life ever… but I strongly feel that it’s this feeling that makes me to sail though the difficult tides of life. The feeling of being with some one very special and close even being actually alone the feeling of a conclave in solitude. Perhaps, the feeling of being adored.
I console myself of the death of my emotions, my desires and my destiny, but are they enough? Can I ever get over the fogbound hills, the damsel beauty and the ballads from the harps? Its just a mere thought or a tale of a crushed love… I am confused myself!!! But I know… whatever it is… I sincerely wish… I had it… I would have lived life so differently from what I have. I am not complaining or something but… it’s a feel of heavens that sometimes, makes even death sweeter or perhaps, it’s the feeling of finding lost love that makes the distances feel shorter.

I wish I could express my emotions to you…

For your presence could have changed the way I lived…

As I walk by the stoned pathways today…

I remember your smile…the pain goes away…

The crippled legs suddenly get the power…

…To walk past the huddles

Raised hands and anxious eyes… still await your feel…

For one day, death shall reunite…the lost love… my destiny… my YOU!!!